Giving birth is like pulling your lower lip over your head
When a mother gives birth to her child it is the ultimate bonding experience. And
when a mother gives her child up for adoption, it is a selfless act for the childs best
interests, but not a painless one. Every parent that is involved in an adoption
arrangement will wonder and worry about their child for many days of many years.
Curiosity is powerful, and it is not uncommon to long to be reunited with ones own flesh
and blood. Adopted children have a right to know who their biological parents are.
Health reasons, curiosity, and the need to bond with family are all important factors that
adopted children face.
Genetic diseases make it essential that a child knows who their birth parents are.
If an adoptees considering starting a family and needs to know his or her chance of
passing on a genetic disease, the identity of his or her parents must be revealed. Also if
an adopted child would like to know his chance of developing a hereditary disease that
will not show effects until old age, he will need information from his biological parents. In
the case of rare blood diseases or a needed organ transplant, an adopted child knowing
who his real parents are could save the childs life. An adopted child should have the
right to access knowledge about their health, even if it means revealing the identity of
both their birth parents.
Every person wants to know where he or she came from. Most of us take for
granted that we know our parents, grandparents, and cultural background. Try to
imagine that you know nothing about your family background. A feeling of emptiness will
surely overwhelm you. Every time a teacher assigns a family tree, or a report on ones
cultural history, adopted children feel lost. Of course adopted parents provide a good
and loving home, as loving as any birth parent would provide, but adopted children will
always be curious about their true heritage.
Today parents who choose to give their child up for adoption have the option of
open adoption. This means the birth parents can decide who they want their childs
adopted parents to be, and the adopted parents keep contact with the birth parents as
the child grows up. The parents can support each other, exchange pictures and stories,
chat online, and this way the birthparents can be aware of what is taking place in their
childs life and maybe even help out with some parenting decisions. Visits are
sometimes arranged and healthy relationships and friendships can be established.
Adopted children feel more secure knowing that their birth parents care about them.
When a parent has a child it is a crucial moment of bonding in both the parents
and childs lives. If that bond is broken, by leaving a child oblivious to who his or her
parents are, the child will have an empty place in his or her heart. This place should be
filled with knowledge of his or her family history, perhaps even a relationship with a birth
parent. Each person on this planet has a right to know where he or she comes from. To
take that away from anyone would be stealing a huge part of their life.