Via Fecal Face: Mike Belleme’s photolog of his dirty uncle, who’s 91. It goes on and on and gets weirder and weirder, but some highlights from the mind of a grade-A Captain Bizarro:
This has been Uncle Dirty’s hobby for the past ten years. He has hundreds of them. Some of the penises come from such publications as “WANG” magazine, but most of them are digital pictures of his own that he cuts and pasts onto other people. He is very proud of the fact that even at his old age he has no problem getting an erection.
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We took a quick trip to the beach, but they told him to leave pretty quickly. He has been getting in trouble with the cops a lot lately. They say he can’t wear the thong on the beach, but they will sometimes let him get away with it if he sits down. The police even came to his house recently because of a complaint from the neighbors about his risque’ attire.
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A brief history on the thong: When he was in his thirties and doing the truck driving thing, Dirty came across a woman’s thong one day in the passenger seat of his truck. He had no idea where it came from or how it got there. He was about to throw it away when he thought, “Eh, maybe I could wear this on the beach.” Since the thong was about three times too big for him he had to cut and resew the seams to fit his waist. As the years passed he made more and more thongs and stuffed bigger and bigger objects in to the front of them.
This is a painting that his daughter made for him (who, by the way, is very disapproving of her father’s lifestyle and hobbies). It is a painting of her skiing in the mountains. As a way of trying to bond with his daughter, he pasted a picture of himself in a thong in the foreground of the painting and poked ski polls through his hands… and drew in a beard and mustache.