For real:

“One is a supporter of Barack Obama, the other is a supporter of Hillary Clinton, and an argument of words turned bloody when one brother-in-law tried to choke the other and the victim then responded with a knife and stabbed his brother-in-law in the stomach.”

The newspaper delicately decided not the publish which brother was for whom. Painting by Titian.

Update: Just realized the Hispanic dude quien gusta stabbing people was for Hillary. Perhaps Barack isn’t doing so well with the Latino vote after all? Anyway, I knew Hillary’s people would pull knives when cornered.